I’m Endorsing LinkedIn For “Endorsements”

Maybe now that Microsoft is acquiring LinkedIn, those awful endorsements will go the way of Clippy.

LinkedIn’s stupid “endorsements” are downright redonkulous. They’re about as meaningful as the “Best Camper” certificate I got in summer camp after sixth grade (that my mother still has saved in a trunk).

I have 33 endorsements on LinkedIn for “Strategic Partnerships” but only 2 for “Strategic Alliances” (um, what’s the difference?) Although I professionally manage and invest other peoples’ money in startups, I only have two endorsements for “Asset Management” and two more for “Valuation” (gulp — are my LPs on LinkedIn?) yet I have more endorsements than those for alleged areas of activity in whichI have never been directly involved, such as “Mobile Devices” (5), “e-Commerce” (4) and “IPO “ (3). Still waiting to ring that bell but three people say I’ve already got the skills. (Ok, I do have 85 for “Venture Capital” and 47 for “investments” so I guess some people think I know what I’m doing.) I consider myself pretty bad (and generally inexperienced) at “Management” but apparently 26 of my esteemed LinkedIn contacts beg to differ to such an extent that they’ve chosen to endorse me for it. I can count on one hand the number of people I’ve directly “managed” in my professional career and I don’t see any of them among those 26.

The truth is I have noticed a strong correlation between LinkedIn contacts who endorse me, and LinkedIn contacts who have never met me IRL, so perhaps that partially explains the phenomenon.

I’m not sure what the “play” is for LinkedIn with these generally meaningless endorsements — engagement in general, or perhaps they figure getting people to endorse me makes me potentially more likely to endorse others (I’m not), but either way I’ve never heard anyone express positive feelings about LinkedIn’s endorsement functionality; reactions generally range from sarcastic to quizzical.

I always say LinkedIn is such a fascinating platform — so many elements that work well alongside so many others that are so fundamentally worthless and broken (see also “LinkedIn Groups”).

Yet endorsements seem to be here to stay. So — to help guide my future endorsers towards skills that I feel more appropriately reflect my true persona and capabilities as an endorsee, I have taken the liberty of using the LinkedIn app to add a number of skills to my profile for which you can now choose to endorse me, such as (these are all real choices on LinkedIn’s drop-down menu):

- “Imagination”

- “Daydreaming”

- “Long Distance Running” (actually that would be true and I’m definitely better at that than “Management”)

- “Humility” (I am freakin’ AWESOME at “Humility”)

- “Humor”

- “Princess Bride” & “Blues Brothers”

(yes all of those are on LinkedIn as “Skills”)

So please help me paint a more accurate picture of myself on LinkedIn by bringing some of my true skills to light via your cherished endorsements. I promise you that I’ve been actively engaged in “Daydreaming “(0) far more than “IPOs” and “e-Commerce” combined (7).

On behalf of myself and LinkedIn, thanks in advance for your endorsements (and I look forward to meeting you in person someday).

@BeninJLM. Rare Medium posts, hopefully well done.

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